Tantric sex for beginners – 6 simple steps

Want more excitement in the bedroom? Tantric sex is a way to bring deep feelings, intimacy and energy back into your sex life. Forget quickies, skipping foreplay and wanting to climax as soon as possible. With tantric sex, you experience slow sex where love, energy and connection are the most important themes. But where to start? We’ll tell you!

What is tantric sex?

Tantra is an ancient Eastern lifestyle where you become aware of your own energy and become more connected to others. In this way of life, it’s important that you don’t deny your feelings, but embrace them instead. From anger to desire and lust, you accept everything. This can be very liberating.

Also read: This is how you keep the flame alive!

The goal of tantric sex

The goal of tantric sex is to not have an orgasm. According to the tantric teachings, orgasming means you expel valuable energy. During tantric sex, the goal is to nurture your desire and lust. These strong sexual feelings fall under sexual energy. By building up and preserving this energy, you’re able to awaken your nervous system and ultimately feel more. The journey is more important than the destination. When you do finally climax, your orgasm will be more intense and more special.

Deeper connection with your partner

Many people have experienced that they feel more connected to each other after tantric sex. They also noticed more physical energy, lucid dreams, more creativity and an increased attraction to others. Many also feel a tingling on their skin during tantric sex. It may all sound a bit strange to you, but that’s okay. You can upgrade your sex life with tantric sex, too! Read on to find out how you can try tantric sex.

Getting started

During tantric sex, the idea is to be self-aware in a positive way. This means that everything you feel should be welcomed and revealed. You should also do everything in utmost concentration so as not to lose the sexual energy. You act slowly and you communicate with your partner through eye contact and tender touch. This is not only very intimate, but it can also make your bond stronger.

Preparing for tantric sex

First, it’s important that you’re open to next-level connection with each other. Talk about it before you start. Make sure you both have a clear understanding of what tantric sex is and what its purpose is. Once you’re on the same page, you can choose a time when you’ll try it out. This is important, as tantric sex can take hours. It can help you feel better by mentally preparing for it beforehand. When the time comes, you should focus on making the space where you’ll be having sex as comfortable as possible. Think soft pillows and cosy candles. Put on clothes that you feel comfortable in.

Also read: How to discuss sexual desires in your relationship

Step-by-step plan

After you’ve set everything up for your tantric experience, you can follow these steps.

Step 1: Sit eye-to-eye with each other

You can sit across from each other in several ways. However, it’s important that you can look at each other. For example, sit across from each other with your legs crossed and your knees together. A more intimate position is one where you fold your ankles around the other’s body. The most popular and desirable position is one where the man sits cross-legged and the woman sits on his lap with her legs wrapped around his body.

Step 2: Make eye contact

Before you start touching each other, eye contact is essential. It allows you to connect with each other. At first, this may feel a little laughable or uncomfortable, but you’ll get used to it quickly. Continue to maintain eye contact until you both feel that you’ve made a connection with each other.

Step 3: Control your breathing

Next, you’re going to focus on your breathing. Breathe from your lower abdomen and let the air escape through your nose. Make sure your breathing rhythm becomes synchronised. Try a tantric kiss: open your mouth slightly and place your lips on those of your lover. Breathe in and out at the same time.

Step 4: Touch each other

Now it’s time to explore each other’s bodies through touch. Move your fingertips over your partner’s body to awaken the nerves. You can also caress around their genitals to stimulate your lover’s arousal more. Anything goes, except penetration. The important thing here is that you do not climax! When you feel like you’re about to orgasm, it can help to focus on your breathing. This can help you regain control of your body.

Step 5: Tantric massages

After caressing each other, you can take it a step further with a massage. Start on your partner’s back and proceed extremely slowly. Massage oil can come in handy here. Let your hands slide over your partner’s body. Then turn them around and continue massaging on the front of their body. Finish at erogenous zones such as nipples, the penis, or the vagina. Remember: your goal is not to make your partner climax.

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Step 6: Sex and finishing

Tantric sex can last as long as you want and need. You can end your tantric experience without cumming at all. In that case, according to tantric teachings, the energy stays in your body, which can make you feel more energetic and relaxed. Still, it’s also possible that you’ve become so aroused that you can no longer resist it. When you move on to penetration, it’s best to choose a position where you can maintain eye contact with each other. It’s also important that you maintain the same slow rhythm and concentration. When the orgasm comes up, it’ll be an unforgettable experience!

Important to remember!

Tantric sex seems easy, but it requires quite a bit of time and practice. When you’re just starting out, chances are that desire will take over from your control along the way. That’s why it’s advisable to try tantric sex more often. When you do that, you’ll find that your sexual energy builds faster and stronger. Also, chances are that you’ll then be less likely to give in to your sexual urges. Last but not least, and perhaps most importantly: you simply get more pleasure out of sex with tantra!

Also read: Improve your relationship with the five love languages!

Do you have any questions about tantric sex or would you like to share your tantric experiences with us? Leave a comment below!