Everything you need to know about sexuality!

While people used to think that girls are only attracted to boys and vice versa, things are very different nowadays. As a society, we’ve become a lot less narrow-minded and we’re embracing more different sexualities. There are fewer taboos, which is good, because being able to express your sexuality is perhaps one of the most important keys to a rich and fulfilling life.

Many people will probably not be familiar with sexualities other than heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual and asexual. And that’s understandable, as they have only been openly discussed in the last few years. Especially among young people, though, you can see that this subject has become very popular. The media also contributes to this – think, for example, of various series on Netflix and how transgender YouTubers are conquering the world.

Also read: LGBTQ pride flags explained

Sexuality is not a phase or a trend that a person is going through. You’re simply born that way. It’s okay if you’re not sure what to think of terms like “pansexual”, “cisgender” or “panromantic”. That’s why the following list will come in handy!

Gay/Lesbian (homosexual)

Persons who are attracted to the same sex and develop (romantic) feelings are homosexual. So either a man and another man (gay) or a woman and another woman (lesbian/gay).

Also read: Everything you need to know for your coming out! 🏳️‍🌈

Straight (heterosexual)

If you’re heterosexual, you’re attracted to the opposite sex. A straight couple always consists of a man and a woman.

Besides heterosexuality, there is also something called heteroflexibility, which is another form of sexual orientation. This person may engage or be interested in limited homosexual activities alongside his or her heterosexual orientation.

Bi (bisexual)

A person who is bi is attracted to both men and women. Within bisexuality, there can still be differences between the person’s preferences, as person A may be more attracted to women than men, while for person B it is the other way around. Bi actually means “two”, so bisexual people can also be attracted to people with other sexualities, such as intersexual or pansexual persons.

Also read: The 6 most common myths about bisexuality

Flexisexual

As a flexisexual person, you’re flexible with your orientation. While you do have a preference for a certain gender, you still find it exciting to experiment with the same gender (if you’re straight) or the other gender (if you’re gay).

Aromantic

If you are an aromantic person, you do not experience romantic feelings towards others. A personal bond will often be nothing more than a good friendship or a sexual relationship.

Asexual

Broadly speaking, you feel no sexual attraction to another person and have no desire for sex. Asexuality is not a preference or a consequence of any trauma, nor is it a choice, because you were born with it. Additionally, asexual persons can have relationships just like anyone else, including romantic feelings. However, there are no sexual feelings.

Different definitions

There are different definitions of asexuality:

1. Absence of sexual behaviour: Some people think that asexuals simply don’t have sex as a principle. This description is not entirely accurate. Just consider that there are several reasons for not having sex (temporarily).
2. Identifying yourself as asexual: In this case, the person calls themselves asexual. 3.8% of the American population identifies like this. However, this definition also has some drawbacks. On what basis does someone consider themselves asexual? This can be different for everyone.
3. Absence of sexual attraction: This is the most commonly adopted definition of asexuality, as I also described above. In Britain, this counts for about 1% of the population. An important distinction here is made between romantic attraction and sexual attraction. Someone may have a desire to be in a romantic relationship, but no desire for sex.

Autosexual

Nope, this has nothing to do with cars. Someone who is autosexual would much rather masturbate than have sex with another person. The body of another person does not excite an autosexual, but touching oneself does. It can happen that the preference for solo sex is stronger than sexual intercourse with another person.

Pansexual

Pansexual can also be called omnisexual. When you’re pansexually attracted to someone, it’s all about the person as an individual. This can be a man, a woman, or something in between. Gender does not determine the preference of a pansexual person.

Panromantic

This means that you can develop romantic feelings for someone, and for all gender identities and genders. However, you don’t feel sexual attraction towards them.

Cisgender

Cisgender is the opposite to transsexuality. If you’re “cis”, you feel good about the gender you were born with and you identify with it. An example: you were born with female sex characteristics and you also identify as female.

Trans

First, let’s talk about the difference between transvestite, transgender and transsexual. A transvestite is someone who sometimes dresses and acts like a member of the opposite sex. A transgender person is non-binary and feels both male and female. In contrast, a transsexual person feels trapped in the wrong body, such as someone identified by medicine as a male based solely on physical characteristics but who is a woman inside and vice versa. Sometimes, this is affirmed with surgery to change the physical appearance.

Intersex

Intersexuality is also known as hermaphroditism. The person  is born with both male and female physical characteristics. In the past, doctors often advised parents to choose one or other gender in which to raise the child. Nowadays, parents are encouraged to allow the child to decide for themselves later in life.

Polysexuality

This sexuality should certainly not be confused with polyamory! Polysexuals are usually more attracted to intersexuals or transgenders. This can be both romantically and sexually.

Demisexuality

Freely translated, demi means “half”. Demisexuals are somewhere between sexual and asexual. There must be a strong emotional connection as a prerequisite for any sexual feelings. Thus, someone who is demisexual has a lesser sexual drive and attraction. Another term for demisexuality is also called grey-asexual.

Were you familiar with all these sexualities? And what’s your sexuality? Share it with us in a comment!